MarkCity

Sunday, October 30, 2005
 
I've just uploaded our holiday pictures.

South Beach

The Everglades

Hurricane Wilma

In more exciting news, we got two new rat girls today! We got them from a rat rescue place in Surrey. One is pure white, and the other is silver fawn. The woman who was fostering them has called them Podgemuffin and Pooflake. We're trying to decide whether to change their names to Fred and Wilma, after the hurricane and continuing our tradition of rats with sexually-ambiguous names. But it's quite hard to get out of the habit of calling them Podge and Poof. Syd is meeting them right now and seems quite excited to have two new friends.

Photos will, of course, follow.



Friday, October 28, 2005
 
Uuurgh.. jetlag. I'm in that weird half-dead state that comes from being awake for 24 hours, most of that time sat in an airport or on a plane. We just went to pick Syd up. She's looking very perky. We're thinking of getting a couple of little sisters for her. Watch this space.

Holiday snaps will appear here during the next couple of days, when I've gathered the energy.

It's good to be back though. In the land of boring weather.



Tuesday, October 25, 2005
 
We survived Wilma! The highlight was when the hotel window blew in and the power died. We've been without electricity for over 24 hours (last night was surreal; we sat in the hotel lobby with a couple of candles eating Pringles and drinking tepid Budweiser) but the power has just come back. Miami isn't devastated - just badly damaged. Trees lie in the road along with traffic lights. Shop windows are gone. Crazed people roam and all the shops are shut. It's post-apocalyptic, man.

At the moment, the airports are closed but we're hoping everything will be back to normal by Thursday when we're due to fly back. We're now waiting for the restaurants to open so we can get some hot food. Oh, and it's cold outside. Not England cold, but not sunbathing weather.



Friday, October 21, 2005
 
The wedding was brought forward because of Wilma the Hurricane, so yesterday we rushed up to Bonita Springs, on the west coast of Florida and stayed at the extremely posh Hyatt Hotel. Much nicer than our Miami hotel. The wedding took place out by the pool, with the rain lashing down in the background. It was a wonderful wedding, actually: another thing the Americans know how to do really well. The girls cried, the blokes cheered and love shone all around. Aah. Later, at the reception, I somehow got hold of the microphone and sang Robbie's 'Angels', accompanied on the choruses by Martin and Dominic. An excellent night.

Today we drove back across Florida stopping off at the Everglades where we took a tram tour and saw tons of alligators (and other less interesting species, like herons and stuff). It was fantastically interesting; a highlight.

The latest news on Wilma is that she's likely to strike Monday, although no one really knows much and we don't know if she's going to hit Miami. It's rubbish weather here, though. Overcast. Bang goes my tan.



Wednesday, October 19, 2005
 
I decided to bring the iBook to Florida after all.

Miami is sticky, sweaty and pretty sleazy, with lunatic panhandlers roaming the streets and the most astonishing humidity this side of Tokyo. It was raining when we arrived yesterday, and this wasn't just a shower but a goddamn cloudburst.

Still, I'm sure Hurricane Wilma will clear the air. Yes, that's right. A record-breaking storm, the strongest ever recorded in the Atlantic, is heading our way, due to hit at the weekend (probably during the wedding, or while we're cruising merrily down the Gulf of Mexico). My God. The Florida Keys have been evacuated. The alligators in the Everglades have packed their crocodile handbags. I will, of course, keep you posted.

Let's hope my next headline won't be 'Florida really blew me away'.



Saturday, October 15, 2005
 
We were supposed to go hot air ballooning today but it was cancelled again because it's too breezy. My Phileas Fogg is going to have to wait. (I was going to say 'Richard Branson impression' but the thought was too horrifying, and not only because of the prospect of crashing.) I guess that means we'll have to stay in and watch X-Factor instead. I can't help it - I'm addicted again, even though that F***wit Louis Walsh chucked out little 16-year-old James, who clearly deserved to win. I don't like any of the other contestants, although I have a soft spot for Chico, the lunatic Ricky Martin-on-speed-a-like who jumped into a pool with a live mike. Last year I recall ranting about how much I hated Sharon Osbourne, but Louis is now my least fave by far. Of course he picked all the boys who might have made it into Boyzone if they'd been prepared for a stint on his casting couch. Horrid, creepy little man.

So we head off to Miami on Tuesday. I've decided not to take my laptop because I don't want to obsessively check my emails while I'm away. However, if I make it near a computer I might post on here. Otherwise I'll be back in two weeks with lots of pictures of me with Will Smith and Don Johnson.

One final thing - Arctic Monkeys are going to be bigger than Oasis. I know I'm not being totally original saying that, but they're brilliant, and they deserve everything that's coming their way.



Sunday, October 09, 2005
 


Little Nancy passed away today after fighting illness for a couple of months. It was awful: we got up this mroning and found her lying on her side, unable to get up. She was obviously suffering so we called the emergency vet and took her down there. When we got home - and I'd managed to stop blubbing - we let Syd say goodbye to her and had a little funeral in the garden. It's so sad. But I know we gave her the best life a rat could ever hope for. Well, she might have hoped for even more chocolate, but then she would have died of gluttony a long time ago.

RIP, Nancy. You were an excellent companion.



Sunday, October 02, 2005
 
Cousin Martin, whose wedding we're going to later this month, has asked me the following question:

What songs are must-haves at wedding receptions?

This is a tricky one. The wedding reception DJ has a responsibility to please everyone, from slack-jawed teens who think that anything released before 1998 is ancient history to inebriated aunts who think anything released after 1978 is a racket in which you can't even understand what they're singing about. Then you have indie snobs like me who would rather be drowned in vomit than listen to the records DJs usually drag out of their dusty boxes on these occasions: 'Hi Ho Silver Lining', 'The Conga', 'Saving All My Love For You'. (Do they still play slowies at wedding discos? You certainly never hear them anywhere else these days.)

The question is made even more complicated by the fact that the groom is British and the bride American, and the guests will be divided along these national lines. For a UK wedding, you would be safe pulling out some pan-generational crowd-pleasers like Robbie's 'Angels', Oasis's 'Wonderwall' and Queen's 'Don't Stop Me Now'. But has anyone in the States heard these records? Goldie Lookin Chain's 'Your Missus is a Nutter' probably wouldn't go down very well, either. Conversely, the DJ, who is going to be American, I imagine, will baffle the Brits if he puts on... er, whichever artists are big in the States but unheard of over here. Gretchen Wilson? The Dave Matthews Band? The aptyl-named Panic at the Disco?

If it was my wedding, I would just plug in my iPod and put it on shuffle. Imagine the joy on the faces of the guests as Morrissey comes on for the eighth time, swiftly followed by Suede, the Killers, Razorlight and the Pixies.

But it's not my wedding, so here are some recommendations.

'Crazy in Love' Beyonce and Jay-Z
'Super Duper Love' Joss Stone (even though it's rubbish)
'Do You Want To?' Franz Ferdinand
Anything by the Beatles
'I Believe in a Thing Called Love' The Darkness

Can anyon else think of any must-have wedding numbers?