Wednesday, May 21, 2003

Who would live in a house like this?

Butter and I are currently trying to win the prize for World's Messiest Flat. This is what happens when you have about a million books and no bookcases. We also have no TV unit, wardrobe, chest of drawers or pot to piss in. Luckily we have a toilet so the pot is unnecessary. The nice people at Argos (hey, we spare no expense) will be delivering lots of furniture this weekend so I will spend the entire weekend with a screwdriver and an indecipherable diagram. Excellent.

I am now a commuter and am delighted to report that Connex's service this week has been marvellous. Unfortunately, the London Underground's service has made me want to jump on the track with the mutant mice that live there.

We're watching the Uefa Cup final at the moment. A little while ago a streaker ran on the pitch, treating the continent to a full view of his meat and two veg. John Motson said, 'If this had been in Britain we wouldn't have covered that incident, but we're in the hands of our Spanish producer.' 'Three cheers for the Spanish producer' said my girlfriend.