Thursday, December 05, 2002
I've just written 1000-odd words of my new novel, so I've earned the right to enter something here. Earlier this year, a friend, who I'll call LV, and I wrote a novel together - a stalker novel with a twist. Anyway, the BBC have optioned it (no, I'm not rich; far from it) but we haven't yet been able to find a publisher for it. Our agent is going to wait and see what happens with the Beeb - ie, will it actually go into production - and then start looking for a publisher. Hopefully, things might start to happen next year. Though I ain't holding my breath...

One of my students told me today about the latest must-have gadget in Japan: a Bowlingual. It's a little machine that translates your dog's speech into human language. You hang this contraption around Fido's neck and when he barks, a translation appears on the Bowlingual's screen. For example *Woof woof* might mean, 'Hmm, your bottom smells delightful.' *Baaark* could be, 'I want to eat that cat so bad it hurts.' What would Gary Larson make of it, I wonder? And will there be one for cats? *Miaow* = "I'm so cool." *Miaow miaow* = "I'm so f**king cool." Etc. If you want a Bowlingual (which only translates into Japanese at the moment, I'm afraid) it will set you back about £75 (14,800JPY).